I find it vaguely alarming that we’re already in 2015, but it’s exciting too because there’s a lot of events and plans I have for this year that I’m excited for. 2014 was good to me: I really found a polish and confidence in my pinup style that made me feel I’m continuing to grow and blossom as a woman; I began this blog and through it met a lot of lovely individuals through both followers and companies alike; but perhaps more importantly of all, I gained a bunch of unwanted weight and learned to love myself anyway.
It was no great surprise that I gained weight this year. My weight has always been something I’ve struggled to be consistent with because I straight up love food and hate exercising. It’s that simple. I’m kind of greedy, really. And this year I stopped exercising and I ate everything I wanted to eat. It’s not the healthiest thing to do because it’s important that everyone lead an active and balanced lifestyle. But I gave myself permission to focus on my life and my passions and enjoying myself, food included, to not beat myself up if I gained weight and to learn to love my body regardless of whether it swelled or shrank. I saw myself gaining weight, more than I wanted, but I still didn’t feel like I wanted to lose that weight, I didn’t feel I had to in order to feel comfortable or pretty or attractive, so I didn’t. I kept eating and I kept relaxing, and I didn’t stress about the lbs piling on. I began to love my body for the mere face that it exists and works and serves me beautifully even when my stomach is almost permanently sporting a food baby. I told myself that I am fabulous at any size, in any shape. And it’s true. I really believe I am. And I believe that kind of self-love and self-confidence is something every woman, every person, deserves to feel.
Body positivity and the journey to self-love is not an easy and flawless one. No person feels beautiful every day of their lives. But it’s important that we all try to look for our own beauty, inside as well as out. I have plenty of a way left to go in treating myself kindly. It’s something I will continue to do even as I do remind myself that I should begin to make healthier choices again for health’s sake. I prefer being a little lighter not just because my clothes fit me a little differently, but because I feel I had more energy and motivation when I was feeding my body better foods and taking time to get active. For me beginning to reincorporate those things into my life again is going to be part of continuing to feed myself love and kindness, rather than a symptom of denying myself such.
And I want to invite you all to do whatever it is you need to do to begin to fall in love with yourselves in 2015. People focus on how amazing they feel when they are loved by others, but it is just as amazing and perhaps more important to feel that kind of love for yourself. In 2015 I want you to begin to be kind to yourselves, to be downright generous with yourselves. To step out of your comfort zone and buy that dress or skirt that scares you a little but you want it anyway. To wear the makeup and hair that’s ‘too much’ for the occasion but makes you feel glamorous. To wear no makeup and tell yourself you’re just as lovely, and mean it. To eat cheesecake guilt free and have lazy days because you deserve it. To give your love to yourself and to others on their body positivity journeys as often as you give out smiles.
I’m beginning a hashtag on Instagram to help us all showcase these moments of self love and to create a community within which to share our glowing moments. I want #LovingMeIn2015 to be a place for you to post anything you want to post that demonstrates all the small ways you’re teaching yourself to feel good about YOU–share your lazy days as well as your workouts, your treat days, your new clothes, your new hair do’s, your favourite features, the flaws you’re learning to love, your best smile, your selfies. Definitely, definitely your selfies. Declare to yourself, me and everyone else that you are liking yourself for yourself in that moment. It is one of the best feelings in the world. I want #LovingMeIn2015 to be for those days you feel as hot as shit just because you got your eyeliner on point, for those days you feel beautiful totally barefaced and sporting major bedhead, and also for those days you’re not feeling too much love inside but know you should, so you look in the mirror anyway and give yourself whatever pep talk you need in order to rally and rise up. #LovingMeIn2015 is for you, any time of day, any day or week or month of the year. It’s for you to boost yourself up and to enlist others to join in boosting themselves too. To hold hands and stand up together as we learn to shout ‘I love myself for me and that is a beautiful thing!’ It’s not a resolution; it’s a revolution. It’s an overhaul, mentally and emotionally, so that we can take control of our minds, souls and well-beings to become happier people.
In 2015 I’m going to make time for activity, to do a few things that scare me, and to say ‘yes’ more to the world. I’m also going to continue loving myself in whatever ways I can. I would love it if you joined me on that journey by either starting or continuing your own journey of self love. If you decide to share that journey with me here in the blog comments or by using the Instagram hashtag I will be incredible honoured and proud.
Happy New Year, darlings. I hope it’s your best yet.