Alright kiddos, LET’S GET SILLY!
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- 10/10 framing on this one
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- Although I think I prefer to be caught headless than mouth-agape mid pose-adjusting
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- Quite what surprised me mid-hat-shift, I can’t say
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- Quick, someone enter this gem in a photography contest!
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- I guess I just felt like channeling some broken doll vibes that day
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- A pointless ‘are my shoes in the shot?’ inquiry I’d wager
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- A test shot that proves a flash is a bad idea, as is, surprisingly, strangers walking in the background of the shot. Who knew?
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- The truly worrying thing about this picture is I know I’ve never burst into dramatic sobs worthy of a toddler’s tantrum while blog shooting, so what the hell was actually happening here?? I’d put a fiver on a bug touching my mouth
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- I tip my invisible hat to you, dear reader!
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- In case you’ve ever wanted to see it, this is my ‘that’s a fucking stupid idea’ face
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- I SWEAR TO GOD THIS WASN’T A BELCH, I JUST WASN’T DONE SWITCHING POSES BETWEEN SHOTS
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- It takes real talent to make sure BOTH hands are awkward and not-ready for the next shot, but for my face to also be a disaster is something else
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- Um, am I a scared horror movie dame or something??
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- Do you think I was a bit fed up this day, per chance?
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- Is a caption even really necessary? Face fail
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- Crooked image and I appear to be happily swaying: am I tipsy or is the photographer?
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- Say what you want about me, I never have overdramatic reactions to small inconveniences, like a twisted necklace
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- Ah yes, a blinking shot, a true classic
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- Ohhhh yeaaah, show ’em that while-adjusting double chin, just how they like it, baby
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- Put me in a butler’s livery and I look like I could be serving invisible cocktails in the most smug yet apathetic fashion ever
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- Literally every bloopers post I do I come away from it singing ‘She’s beauty and she’s grace, she’s Miss United States!’ and this kinda shit is why
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- These bloopers just serve to show me what weird things I do with my lips between shots
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- A face that has absolutely given up and half in shadow, there’s no way this could turn out a bad picture!
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- What do you mean over-exposed photos in which your mother’s shadow is clearly visible don’t make for super stylish fashion shots??
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- It’s not obvious I overbalanced here, right? I saved it in a very cool manner, right? Right?!!
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- ‘Um, I don’t think so’ I squeak in a sing-song child’s voice while pulling this face at friends and family when I want to disagree in a lighthearted fashion. Why YES, I am very annoying, I’m glad you’ve noticed
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- At first you might simply think ‘It’s not a very interesting photo, but I’m not sure it counts as a blooper’ …and then you notice my sister’s dog
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- Here is the question: am I raising the roof (badly,) or am I shouting ‘OH FINE, I’LL JUST DO IT MYSELF, LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE AROUND HERE’?
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- Is it ever possible to achieve a serene picture without eyelids accidentally most the way closed?? I say no
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- Likewise, there’s no point attempting a graceful hat touch if you aren’t going to blur your hand (bonus points for drunken crossed eyes)
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- I mean, how am I supposed to choose my favourite part of this shot? Ungainly feet position, hands not quite made it to their place in time, THAT FUCKING FACE. It’s all gold, ALL GOLD I SAY
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- It’s almost as if tugging at the waist of your dress mid-shot, creating a blocked shape torso, uneven shoulders and a condensed facial expression, ISN’T A GOOD IDEA???
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- This may look like a horrendous attempt at photoshopping me onto a background, but alarmingly this awkward composition was real
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- The embarrassing thing is that I can’t guarantee I was actually having a silly little fun prance, rather than trying to simulate one as a pose thinking it would look charming in motion. Yikes!
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- This genuinely looks like I fell fully asleep during a between-shots adjustment
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- What’s worse, an exposed bra strap or an exposed double chin? Jeez
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- For the Hogwarts Houses outfit series I decided it would be fun to try to pose with personalities that aligned with the Houses I was representing…
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- So while this is just an awkwardly timed shot, the following are awkward in unfortunate ways that were half deliberate:
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- I decided that my Hufflepuff character would be, of all things, cheeky
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- And maybe a bit sassy with it, sometimes, I guess?
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- Like, apparently I was so set on this pose/expression I thought it warranted two tries?
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- Oh shit, wait, 3 times. Goddamnit!
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- I don’t think it progressed to anything that much better when I took a turn towards the silly
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- I suspect I was aiming for ‘impish’ here, maybe with a childlike joy. FAIL!
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- Oh well this is straight up crazy eyes, so I can blame that only on exasperation and not the Hufflepuffs
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- For this Gryffindor look I think I decided the personality should be a bit jerky, prankster-ish, wild in a totally tame and inconsequential way
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- Pointing obnoxiously to the Gryffindor badge I was wearing absolutely did not translate as anything remotely close to fun or quirky like I was probably hoping
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- But I quickly lose the plot and took a turn into…like, judging by these eyebrows, an overblown parody of a mocking jock??
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- Which is possibly still better than this, which reads wholly as ‘HER DURR DURR UHERR, ME DUMB.’ I wish I could say this was ill-thought out yet deliberate. I think it’s a true blooper, alas.
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- CONFUSED MR KRABS MEME
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- That existential dread will sneak up on you at any time, just you watch
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- Why did I even try to look calm if I was going to SEEMINGLY REACH INTO MY ARMPIT DURING THE SHOT?
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- The wind was a bit sharp that day so I was tentative to the point of ruining my own shots
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- For good reason, as it turns out.
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- At least no one can say my face isn’t expressive
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- Why this shot ended up amongst the chaos, I do not know
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- A slightly more subtle version of the stupid face I pull when searching for something on my person while someone waits for me. Yep, it’s stupid
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- That was still possibly better than this ‘I’m finding my pockets, don’t take the photo yet’ panicked monster face I pull on EVERY shoot
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- Oh tree, you are just so delightful and charming
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- Probably wouldn’t need to feel around for my whereabouts if I would just open my eyes
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- A classic ‘what did I just step in?’
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- Oh hey, why don’t you take a good look at these bird-poo-covered-leaves I’m making an effort to bring focus to?
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- A camera just slightly set low for me makes me look like a weird giant
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- It’s impressive how my body seems to be facing in two different directions at once
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- This is like a promo shot for the over-confident, ‘cool’ smug character in an 80s high school sitcom
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- And this is character promo shot for the ‘whacky aunt’ character
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- How are my eyes closed AND the remote both in shot when *I* clicked the button? WHY WASN’T I READY?!
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- The most begrudging, low-energy do-si-do ever performed
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- Oh these? These are my sexy eyes. Can’t you tell?
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- Oh good, another one in which I wasn’t fully ready with my lips yet, cool, cool, cool
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- Is this really any better though?
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- FOR FUCKS SAKES
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- Excellent, another weird-mouth shot, because we were running so short on those
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- My, my, I sure love relaxing my face into a hopefully-tranquil state while holding my hand awkwardly in shot like a seized-up claw, it’s a great combo
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- In my opinion not enough bloggers attempt poses that look like they’re inspecting their armpits for scent or stains, they’re really missing out
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- It’s a wonder compiling these bloopers doesn’t make me cry, because LOOK AT THAT FUCKING FACE
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- Blurry ball handling, standard
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- Why did I hit the remote for this shot, LITERALLY NO PART OF ME WAS POSITIONED YET!
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- Sure, I was tucking the leopard dress back inside my coat, but that’s not what it looks like I’m doing, does it?
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- Although I prefer a shot that looks like a nice little vulva pat than this nonsense
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- Few things are more embarrassing than when I attempt a relaxed, graceful pose that looks fucking stupid. Exhibit A
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- ‘Uh…what are you doing with that camera?’
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- ‘What, you’re taking photos of ME? Really? *squeaky with surprise*
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- Overshooting an attempt to look regal or experiencing that sharp pain in my nose that means a sneeze is coming?
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- Jesus Christ, judging by this shot a sneeze had barely just passed
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- MUM, STOP TAKING PICTURES OF MY ADJUSTMENTS AND THEN LAUGHING ABOUT IT WHEN YOU CHECK THE PHOTO ON THE CAMERA, GODDAMNIT WOMAN!
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- OH TREE, YOU ARE JUST SUH SUH FUNNEE, ALMOST AS FUNNY AS SALADS
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- Maybe I shouldn’t have brought my invisible laundry basket to the shoot for balancing against my hip?
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- Oh good, I’m glad this photo exists. Brilliant.
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- If you’re thinking you can pose with one hand casually stretched back to loosely hold that pillar, let me tell you now, that absolutely will not work
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- Alright, alright, no need to get so uppity about it! Put that face away
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- Present day Amy, the one writing these captions; she sighs, a lot.
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- Oh good, MUCH, MUCH BETTER
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- Cape tip; if there aren’t sleeves don’t stand with your arms at your sides, because you will look like a miserable and very stiff doll
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- Can you tell I had foot pain this day? No, of course you can’t, because I’m a pro, JUST LOOK AT THAT COMPOSED FACE
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- WHY EVEN. WHY!
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- This image to me feels so much like my mum just getting on with things. Head slightly down, powering forward!
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- 0/10, no redeeming qualities
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- sCREW THIS, i’M LEaviNG!
Miss Amy May 
These are hilarious and make me feel so much better about the not-so-perfect shots for my blog. 😀
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